Yesterday I said "Arf."

I needed to go outside. The usual growl-bark-whine combination was getting me nowhere. The humans were ignoring me. After repeating the growl-bark-whine several times, I began to feel a creeping sense of frustration as well as an ever-increasing urgency to pee.

Then I said it. "Arf." It sounded just like you spell it. "Arf." It was a total cliché. Conversation stopped for a second. Then, "Did he say Arf?" "Next thing you know, he'll be saying Bow Wow."

Very funny.

I'm a dog. Sometimes dogs say Arf.

My specialty is the early morning high-pitched whine. But I can say arugula. I can say "Humboldt, a robber." And one time I said "road map of England."